


No time

by KiraH69



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Hopeful Ending, M/M, Post-Nogitsune, Post-Nogitsune Stiles Stilinski, Psychological Trauma, Stiles is Pushed Out of the Pack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-07
Updated: 2018-09-07
Packaged: 2019-06-22 17:37:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,035
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15587169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KiraH69/pseuds/KiraH69
Summary: “Do I bring you too many memories?”





	No time

**Author's Note:**

  * For [syriala](https://archiveofourown.org/users/syriala/gifts).



> Hope you like it. This is the first time I write directly in English so I hope it's not too bad.

The Nogitsune was gone, but Stiles still woke up to dreams where his hands were drenched in blood. Warm, wet blood. The worst part of it all was that he enjoyed it in a way back then. Being strong, not being the puny human for once.

Maybe the pack could feel that and that's why they keep their distance with him. They tried to be kind, to behave like always, but they didn't touch him, they didn't look at him more than necessary. What he regretted the most was Allison's death. They told him it wasn't his fault, and it was true that it wasn't his mind, his desire, his will, but they were his hands, and he saw it, he felt it. The sword going through her soft, fragile body. Stiles regretted Allison's death, but he regretted even more the pain it caused to Chris. Because of Stiles, the man had lost the only one he had left. Stiles could admit now that he'd had a crush for the hunter for... well, too long. Now, though, he felt so deeply guilty that he couldn't even think about that. Chris must hate him so, so much. The man must remember his daughter's dead every time he saw Stiles. Chris must think that if only he had shot him when he could, then Allison would still be alive.

He should have done it.

The boy tried to avoid him as much as he could. Stiles disappeared from the pack meetings when the hunter came. If he couldn't, Stiles lowered his head and kept as much distance as possible. He barely answered with a “hi” or bowing his head when Chris greeted him. The man was trying to be polite, and it hurt.

“Do I bring you too many memories?” asked the man one day. It was unexpected, they hadn't talked – really talked – since _before._

It took a few seconds for Stiles to process what Chris had said. He was in the kitchen, cooking some dinner for the pack. That, at least, he could do. Chris was at the door, his strong arms crossed over his firm chest. Stiles looked directly at him for the first time in months. Chris had some more wrinkles from tiredness and mourning, maybe some more silver hairs too, but he was as attractive as always.

“Yes,” Stiles answered truthfully. “I suppose it's the same for you.”

“Yes. But not in the way you're thinking. I don't hate you, if that's what you think.”

Stiles looked at him with surprise; the sauce cooking too much on the fire, forgotten.

“I killed her,” Stiles told him confused.

“The Nogitsune did,” Chris replied.

“With my hands.”

Chris kept silence for a minute, just looking at Stiles, frowning. He took a step into the kitchen, and Stiles would have stepped back if he could. Chris stopped, maybe not wanting to scare him like a deer.

“Maybe the pack doesn't understand completely what happened back then, but I'm a hunter. This was not the first time I witness a possession. In none of them the possessed had the fault of the acts committed by the demon or whatever it was. The only difference between those possessions and yours is that you survived. And now you have to live with those memories. You can't have the relief of death.”

“I could.” He had thought about it so many times.

“I won't allow that.” His tone was so firm that Stiles believed him. It was a promise, an order.

Stiles ran a hand through his hair and turned around. He removed the pan from the fire and turned it off; the sauce was already wasted.

“You know, I have a crush for you,” Stiles said. He wasn't sure why he was now confessing. Maybe with that Chris would let him alone. That is usually what happened when you got an undesired confession, you avoided that person. “I know, you could be my father, blah, blah. What can I do? You're hot as hell.”

“I feel flattered, especially coming from an attractive and intelligent boy like you,” was Chris' answer. 

Stiles tensed. He couldn't have heard it right.

“You shouldn't give me false hope, that's cruel,” murmured the boy.

“I don't blame you for Allison's death, and I was being truthful, I find you quite attractive.”

“To talk about your dead daughter and flirt with a boy her age in the same sentence doesn't seem proper.” He saw by the corner of the eye Chris' expression darkening. Stiles bit his tongue. He should be more careful with his filter brain to mouth. “Sorry, I didn't... I...”

His hands were trembling, his breath quickening. He felt near a panic attack. He was fucking everything, more than it already was.

“Stiles, Stiles...”

Chris put his hands tentatively over his shoulders and turned him around. Stiles notice for the first time that he was an inch taller than the hunter. A strange moment to notice it, but Chris was so close.

“Chris... I don't...”

“Breathe, breathe with me,” Chris told him, pressing lightly his shoulders. “Let me help you.”

“Help me with what?” asked Stiles in a whisper.

“With the trauma. With your crush with me that it's not a crush, right? We both have to overcome the former and accept the later. We can do it together.”

Stiles looked at him, frowning, confused.

“Is it you? Is it really you? I mean, this is so unreal. Why would you...?” His voice sounded like he was about to cry, and he didn't want that.

“I don't want to lose the last thing I care about in this world,” Chris answered in a whisper. It was so truthful that it couldn't be said louder.

Stiles grabbed him by the shirt and kissed him with so much desperation that it hurt. Chris slowed the kiss, gentle and sweet, and put his hands on Stiles' hips. Stiles relaxed and sighed with relief against Chris lips.

“So... we're going to give this a try? Nothing about 'I'm too old for you' or 'you're too young and should experiment'.”

“Our life can be shorter than most, there's no time for that. And we can experiment together.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> [My blog](http://kirah69-fanfic.blogspot.com). [My tumblr](http://kirah69.tumblr.com/).


End file.
